Labels: Left Me In Misery And Sadness

Labels: Alhamdulillah She's Ok

I'll regret this day for the rest of my life... i should be beaten up 10 times over for loosing some1 so special as you... but this is what u wanted... u asked me to give up on u... u tried so hard to make me give up... all u had to do was ask & u finally did... if beign with me hurts u so much... then i got no choice but to let go... cos ur happiness is more important to me... seeing u change so much this past few months made me realise dat... I just hope dat 1 day, u'll tell me the real reason why u did what u did... till we meet again... In Loving Memory of Siti Rohani Bte Suwarji... Remember the words i used to say to u cos it'll nvr change... my feeling won't ever change... Goodbye... I'll leave it @ this... I dun wish to write any further...

Thx for reading...

Labels: In Loving Memory

Labels: 1 down 3 more to go

Molly, Kak Nureen & Kak Sha2

Our Yummy Dinner @ Mad Jack

Me =)

Eugene

Amirul & Rafiq

Ahmad

Amal

This past few weeks have been really2 tough on me... I had to rush to meet deadlines for my assignments... 1 assignment in particular was AECAD... this assignment was due last Fri which was the same day as my FAT (Fundamentals Of Aerospace Technology) test... I had to skip my math lesson in the morning jus so dat i could print the assignments... only to noe a few hrs ltr dat i need to print it in A3 paper including classroom templates & Cover page... The whole day was chaotic but in the midst of it all, some1 stepped up to help me... my classmate Hidayah had her FAT test a few days b4, so she was free dat day & to my surprise, she helped me to print out my assignments... OMG... dat was so kind of her... i was touched.

Words could'nt describe how thank full i was to her... Btw Amal helped me as well but erm... he also nearly gave me a heart attk by disappearing with my assignments 2mins before the deadline... in the chaos, i juz handed in what i had & got it over with... i hope i can at least get a 'B' for that assignment. There's still so much assignments left to do & so little time to do it... i dun think i can fin it all... sigh. Despite all this Chaos, my classmates still managed to keep my spirits up & made me laugh. Thx guyz... for everything... i hope u guyz can keep putting a smile on my face... cos rite now... i'm loosing my strength... it seems like i'm loosing myself.

I'm easily enraged... easily frustrated... easily giving up... always tired for some reason... i feel so worn out. No mood to do anything anymore. Other than that, a number of unknowns are trying to get into my life... hmm... srry girls... there's usually a ulterior motive behind all that sweet talks & kindness... i'm not falling for that ever again... not ever. Maybe u guys are sincere... maybe it's juz me... i dun really care... rite nw, friendship is good enough for me... cos what if it happened again... falling for the charm, the cuteness, the flirt game... no thx. I'm waiting & will continue to wait for a sign... i'll wait for the day to go back to normal again... the day i can hold her hands & say those words to her & hearing her say it back to me... tears will fall but it'll be tears of joy... the day she's by my side again... Maybe i'm just dreaming... but it keeps me going... at least for now... that'll all the hope i have left.

Now for the BIG NEWS!! I finally told my mom about my past relationships the other day... i nvr tot she would understand but to my surprise, she did... we grew closer dat day... i told her everything, my injuries, my fights, the tragedy, the special people who made me the man i am tdy... the past, good, bad & the ugly... Everything. It's like as though a huge burden was lifted off my shoulders. No more secrets... nothing left to unload. She now noes what i went though all alone. She said lots of stuffs too... like for example...

Mom:

No wonder u suddenly wanted to go to NS 1st,
No wonder u were always in your room for days dat time,
No wonder u always look so sad,
No wonder u & kak Shasha didn't talk till recently,
I asked you but u juz kept quiet so i stopped asking...

I did'nt noe she was so worried for me... she kept quiet when i told her about my injuries... srry i kept it all from u... srry i made u worry. We talked about the past till late & she told me dat i'm so like my dad cos i easily get jealous. Aiyo!! I dun like to be compared to my Dad seh... Hate it!! But it's true... i easily get jealous... over the smallest things... i'm not proud of it.

Then she gave me her sincere opinions on the girls i fell for... the good & bad. But i was surprised to hear her praises =)

I was like Ooooh Aaaam Geeee!! Wow!! I smiled widely after those remarks she gave. Hehe.

Oh ya... Iv'e been going to Haikle's place this past few days to hit his sandbags... juz wanted to unload some steam... srry Dude... i ripped it up... i guess i got too much piled up inside. it's been so long since i hit the sandbags... it felt so good. I was actually expecting dat retard mat rape i fought last time to come bck for some payback but i guess i was wrong. Maybe he finally decided to give up dat stupid mindset of his... Looser. I kinda need to unload on some1... if only i can fight again... it'll be such a stress releaver seh =)

Oh ya!! My classmates & i went to have our dinner @ Mad Jack ystdy after skool. It was the best meal i had this month seh!! AWESOMENESS!! Hehe. My family also gave Kak Nurreen a B'day Surprise last Sat. It was fun!! Wak Som made us laugh so much with her lecture about relationships. Hehe. I was practically rolling on the floor laughing even though i was also bz doing my FAT assignment. After the B'day surprise, my parents blanja all of them for supper @ Aliff (dunno if it's the rite spelling) which was @ Bukit Gombak around 10+pm before going home & calling it a day.

Okay... dats it... Srry if the post is all jumbled up...

Thx for reading guyz...

Labels: Like a Time Bomb waiting to go BOOM