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Friday, August 21, 2009
It's finally that time of year again... I've been looking forward to it since GOD noes when... I noe you guys must be wondering why would i like the fasting month... cos we can't eat or drink till 7+pm. Actually to me... It's like any other normal day... cos normally i dun eat or drink till night time either. The main reason why the fasting month/bulan puasa is so precious to me is cos, i feel closer to my lost love ones. It's the time of year where we're visited by those who have already gone to the other side. Believe it or not during this period of time, i sometimes feel her presence... the love of my life... i smell her distict but faint perfume when i'm praying/sembayang terawir @ home. So during this time of month, i'll sometimes just lock myself in my room & pray after break fast/ buka puasa. I assure u dat i'm not insane no matter what people thinks of me. But it's true... ask ur parents if u dun believe me(malay people only)... The bad spirits are locked up while the good one are free to roam & visit their love ones once again. Ystdy was the last night before puasa... i can't help but to think back on the past esp last year where i was @ the peak of happiness but look at me now... still the same & single. Then i kept thinking about my friends when they ask me to get married... once again i remember "THE DAY" when i poped out the question & asked Sha to marry me all those years bck. I kept thinking & still blame myself for the accident... i think i would have been happy with her rite now if i had sent her back home myself. I can't help but feel sad as tears filled my eyes as i chat with Hudz on MSN ystdy. Loosing a love one during Raya is as heartless as it gets... it's enough to make anyone loose faith in GOD/Allah... i hated him so much after that day... i ask mysef why must i celebrate Raya?! It's totally meaningless to celebrate an occasion esp when ur fiance passed away during that period of time. I felt so bitter back then because everyone didn't understand what i was going thru... i end up staying home every single day of Hari Raya except for the 1st day & continued for 6 years straight. I've only started to find a purpose to celebrate Hari Raya 2 years ago. Thanks to my close friends & family besides someone special told me that i should start getting to know my relatives & family. Cherish the ones that you still have with you. But today i read her blog & found out that she's going thru the same thing that i went thru all those years back. I want you to know that ur not crazy... It's ok if you don't want to celebrate this year... find the strength to forgive yourself in order to be happy. I havn't seen you for ages now but i can only imagine the sad look as u wrote that post. I've always cared for you dearly & i've been praying for your happiness & safety ever since i found out that you lost your Dad last year. Who would have tot the day that was so special to me could ever be the sadest day to you... 24th December 1997 was the day Sha & i reunited after going to different Sec School & cos we lost contact before that day, thx to her parents moving house. So it was a special day for me & i remember every single thing that happened that day. I still think that ur the most strongest person i noe & i noe that u can get thru this. The difference between both our tragedies is that u can still confide in your Mom & Sis about how ur feeling. I had no1... my parent dun even know what happened to me at that time & why i shut everyone out of my life & went to NS. Trust me when i say that i think i noe what ur going thru & If you need someone to talk to, i'm always online. Hope u'll be smiling & be SUPER bubbly again soon. Tc Always. Now for the update!! I got my Bursary a few weeks back & decided to blanja my whole family to Sakura because they never been there before & i juz felt like pampering my family abit. Hehe. On dat day, i went to meet them @ Orchard Sakura after my class ended on Fri. They were all in awe of the place & they were all smiling widely after the 1st few bites. Hehe. I'm so happy that my parents were happy. We ended eating from 7:30pm till 9:15pm. We ate till out tummy screamed for help. Hahaha. Heres a few pics we took on that day =)
 Then a few days after that, i took my close friend & best friends out to Sakura too. Hehe. We celebrated Pika's belated B'day & Hudz gave her a gift. We end up eating till the place was about to close, Hudz nk muntah, Pika took off her belt cos her tummy was bloated(dah brapa bulan tu Pika?) & Amirul couldn't even walk straight cos he was too full. Hahahaha. I miss my best friends!! Hope u guyz enjoyed urself!! Not fgting Amirul who's been the one tutoring me for every common test & exam i had so far. Hehehe. Heres some of the pics we took dat night.  This pic was taken by Hudz. I like it alot Hudz!!   Labels: Find Your Light and Forgive yourself |
 
Mohamad Syamirza
a.k.a Syam (Erm... apparently almost everyone in my class calls me my this name now... even teachers -_-") MiRzA (Norm for relatives & friends) Mimi (LoL Pika only... so far) ZaZa (Ak only so far =P) I'm 26 25/12/1984 --- Msn Likes: NFL, Cycling, Bowling, Badminton, Outdoor Activiteis, Music, Animes, Movies, Games  New Jeans New Clothes A White Beanie A new MP3 A Big Punching Bag Boxer Gloves A New Set Of Weight A Black Bicycle w/gearsSorry if i leave anyone out :) MJ12 Zi Yee Siti Yuyun Hidayah hAni Ayue Ayue2 A.W.A AfiqNadd Molly Dee Sabby Linda Dyla Yana Fyda BEN Ahmad Amirul Clarissa Pei Yi Pika Fir Khir Jas SrtStf Tunchit Acah Badd Latiff Hafiz Nizar Kamisah Zach Dzhabar Isnady Shawn March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 April 2010 September 2010 October 2010 July 2011 August 2011 September 2011 November 2011 April 2012   Music Playlist at MixPod.com Designer: SiewSuen♥ Basecode:Chili. |
